Spew

Read: James 3:1-12
NIV

It seems like for the last 2 weeks or so, I've been overdosing on words about sin. Whatever church setting I've been in, it's been about sin. Fellowship... we get into deep conversation about sin. It feels kind of overwhelming - but it also feels intentional, like God is behind the barrage of anti-sin words. Is He trying to reach me to remind me or prepare me? Or get me to see something that I'm doing that I'm not aware of? 

Sometimes it's what you aren't aware of that's the absolute worst.

It's kind of a roller coaster, because one minute I've learned to ask God for forgiveness when I pray and confess... then I have to learn how to forgive myself. Even when I think I've forgiven myself, the enemy works in such away that sins are unearthed in my mind, and I will spiral back into a state of unforgiveness towards myself... and perhaps unforgiveness towards other people as things I've forgiven people for become unearthed. 

As I've been on the receiving end of this sin-teaching roller coaster... I've been thinking about -

• Men get into specific patterns of negativity, which lead to lifestyles of negativity, which is fueled by sin and then continues to produce a downward spiral of negative, sinful lifestyle.

• We have to be conscious of sin, from the early symptoms of it - like desire & temptation, so we can avoid carrying out a sin.

• Forgiveness - God expects us to forgive, especially when we seek forgiveness from Him.

• Sin is a vicious cycle, and the only way out is through Christ.

• Salvation is ours, but salvation is a relationship w/ Christ that leads to our growth and change - away from sin.

Of course, in no way is that a complete list of everything, but those are some things that have been on my mind. Anything sin-related is a heavy thing to take on. I think that's why people scatter when sin is brought up, because it's an unpleasant weight on our hearts, one we don't want to deal with. The enemy wants us to keep our burdens close, so we can be imprisoned by them, and maintain a life of sin.

If there were no victory in Christ through his sacrifice, that might actually be a problem. Even when we are mired for years in sin and burden, Christ has already paid our sin debt - he's in a perpetual state of wanting us to accept that gift. He wants us to run to Him, and lay our sin at the Cross.

"Words that build or destroy... dirt, dry bones, sand, and stone..." - U2

James 3:1-12 talks about how we spew our words carelessly. How the littlest thing we say can be completely inflammatory, resulting in chaos & hurt. This goes back to another teaching about sin I read up on this week - about gossip. 

Gossip is everywhere... offices, family settings, churches.. Did I mention churches? Even the un-churched identify 2 key reasons why they would never set foot into a church is because of Politics & Gossip. They don't want anything to do with it. 

I don't blame them.

I wonder sometimes.. when I talk about frustrations, like with church Politics & Gossip - am I fostering the beginnings a negativity-driven lifestyle? I mean, I thought I was just getting some stuff off of my chest. To think that I'm actually creating negativity through trying to process my thoughts about something is crazy. I'm an emotional person, and I know that my words can cut more the angrier I get.

Interesting though... as I look at my life now, I'm really cautious when it comes to the church. I'm aware of the things I'm frustrated with, but in talking about those things, there's a distance between me and my giving myself the go-ahead to go head-long in building friendships and getting involved. That has only gained momentum over the years with having had negative experiences in "the journey."

When I take a step back and look at that, I realize that I do want to be in church, and I do want to build relationships with people, and I do want to grow in my relationship with Christ. 

Words of unforgiveness, words of anger, words of hurt, words of gossip -- may we be aware that if we don't filter our words in a way that magnifies God, that they can do damage. Damaging words are part of the sin roller coaster, because ultimately, our words aren't supposed to turn people away from God - they should turn people, and ourselves, towards God. Let our words be words that cause people to run to God as fast as we can.